Friday, September 30, 2005

Tag tag tag tag tag tag tag

Raj tagged me.

The rules:
1. Go to your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest)
4. Post the text of the sentence with these instructions.
5. Tag 5 people.

My 23rd post doesnt have 5th sentence neither the 5th line. So I guess the closest will be its third line? well it is.

Shah Abdul Latif Bhitai - His life.

I have to Tag 5? Okay lets see:

1. My Basha.

2. uXuf.

3. Mariam.

4. Raheel.

5. Sid.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Man is an Evil.

Was cleaning my Hard Disk and found this. This was the draft I wrote in a night for someone, if I remember right the topic was something like 'Man is an Evil' and she had to speak against it. I dont remember the dates when I wrote this but it was around a year or two back. (I like the last line :p)




The first man created, Adam, a prophet…was he an evil? Almost 114 thousands prophets were born on this earth, were they evil? Humans can make wonders, we sent the teams in space and brought them back safely, we fought with disasters diseases, found the cures, saved hundreds and thousands of lives…was all that a work of an evil nature? Without a fear and favor, tell me, do u see an evil in a sweet lil new born baby?...because I don’t.

People argue man being involved in wars as he being an evil, how many of u believes our national heroes who gave their lives in 65 and 71 were the evils? If they were not, how do we actually define evil? What this Evil really is?

Professor Paul Wilson’s lecture at Bond University on March 30, 2000. A criminologist confessed that he did not know how to define evil, but this did not prevent him from immediately classifying some acts as evil, it is only because of the genocide. For example having a pre marriage child maybe seen as an evil in east but not in western world. To be more precise, its only a question of survival, if something promotes survival as individuals, communities or countries, it is good, if not, it is an evil.

How can we say man has an evil nature when for all of us evil has different meaning? The fact is, the man, like any other animal only would like to survive. Then all the violence, war, crime, corruption, dishonesty, and immorality where did it come from? In the book “Seven Theories of Human Nature” B. F. Skinner, a Harvard psychology professor, believed that humans are completely programmable via classical conditioning methods. A newborn baby can be conditioned to become a doctor, lawyer, or serial killer depending on its environment.

Let me put my question in Herbert W. Armstrong’s words “Did an all-loving, all-merciful, almighty GOD deliberately plague the human race He created with an inborn nature of vanity, lust, and greed – with a heart of hostility against God, of deceit, envy, jealousy, and hatred?”. The simple logical answer is ‘No’. If man was an evil, why would God chose him to be His Messenger, His prophet on earth?

It is only man’s ability to learn, to absorb, and to find a way to survive. And it is only the circumstances, the events, faulty cultures and neighborhood’s which sometimes influence and make him do some of the things which really r evil. Even then though, I would like to quote Anne Frank “In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart”.

Thank U tata bye bye ab jaan chor do :p

Friday, September 23, 2005

Hurricane Rita.

Dad is on his way to evacuate Houston. I was trying to call but couldn’t get thru. Maybe the cell is not working on the highway or something. He wasn’t sure where he was going, at the moment he was just leaving town.

Hurricane Rita is probably going to hit on Saturday, lets just hope it doesn’t make any serious damage.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Two way roads.

*calls dad*

Me: Baba…

*continues*

Me: So! Whatcha think?
Dad: What you think?
Me: I am not decisive
Dad: I am still trying, still taking risks, life is about taking risks. If there is a bag full of good and bad apples you must take a risk to get a good one, the more risks you take the more chances you will get more good apples, but, if you stay idle for the fear of getting a bad one, you will never get a good one either.


Thursday, September 15, 2005

Bewildered.

After having a long day slept at around 3:30 when the power was out already.

7:17 AM : *mobile rings, M’s call*

Me : Hello
M : Hello, sleeping?
Me : Yeah, what’s up?
M : Listen….
….
..
Me : hmmmm. Okay.
M : *continues*
Me : hmmm yeah. Hmm
M : *continues* Okay?
Me : Yes. Yeah.
M : Let me call you in a minute.
Me : Okay.

*this call lasted 5 min 27 seconds*


7:25 AM : *cell rings again*

M : *continues*
Me : Okay.

*this call was of 3 min 23 seconds*

Its 9:06 AM now, I have been restless, either walking in my room or sitting, thinking and cant seem to decide. My heart beat is little faster than usual. I am not sleepy anymore.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Matin

The only good friend I have had left in town is going Dubai tomorrow for good. Good luck dear friend.

There will be no more random calls in the middle of night or at the ‘fajr’ to ask ‘lets go for ‘nashta’’. At any random hour when I need to talk to someone there will be none; in the middle of hell hot afternoon there will be no one to challenge in snooker.

Probably Amamr Jaleel once wrote ‘one who doesn’t make new friends with time will soon be left alone’, I can’t disagree.

I was about to have my dinner when he called and told me, went to see him and than I wasn’t hungry anymore.

Okay. Yes, I am depressed.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Tagged

Usually I try my best to run un-noticed from the tagging but what the heck. Raheel and Asma tagged me.

5 years ago: Things were going fine as I planned (as with, what was within my grasp) after few month of depression that I have had. I was feeling better, confident. (only later I realized life is not the name of one finishing line, the race continues, objectives and priorities changed, things that you were proud of few years back, can now be the reasons of your embarrassment or vice versa.)

1 Year ago: Happy, afraid, disappointed, confident but confused.

5 songs I know all the words to: There is not a single one.

5 Snacks I enjoy: Can I say tea? And tea and more tea? ..what else? Tea?

5 Things I'd do w/ $100 million dollars: I could say I will spend half in charity, and the rest, I will spend and enjoy, but the truth is, I don’t know.

5 places I would run away to: If childhood was a place that would be the only place I want to run away to.

5 things I would never wear: Skin tight jeans/pants, shiny shirts, colors like bright red or yellow, shorts.

5 favorite tv shows: Star trek: The Next Generations, Star trek: The Enterprise, X-Files, are there any other shows/programs on TV?

5 greatest joys: I will pass this one.

5 favorite toys: Have non, but lets say my Cell, Digi, PC, Books.

People I'm tagging: Marium, Mahwash, My Basha, uXuf, Sid, Umema, esSJee, Madiha, Kiran, Ghazal, Shaima, Saira, Sanaa, T M

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Dear Jony.

Dear Jony,

Thank you for writing, I received your message and was delighted to know you remembered me on your 100th post. Please accept my congratulations. You see, what matter and what does not; depends on the set of rules that we define for ourselves.

Think of me like a life, you are living me and how you live me depends on you and you alone. Yes even without you I will stay here; a lot of others will enjoy me or find my shoulder to cry for, you will become faded memory in no time, but, that’s just how you see it, take a broader look, in reality, it is me who doesn’t exist without you (not you as an individual, but you as collective form of your species). I will be non-existent, unheard of without you.

I am just like a bridge between you and others like you, all of you are different and I am one of the sources that connect you and I love you all. If you abandon me that would be like, every drop saying ‘what contribution do I bring in the ocean?’ And walk away; resulting a huge gap, a desert of sand and not a drop of water.

Jony, I never claimed I know you, I do understand that there is a self-esteem and there is a dignity (also defined by your own protocols) and to protect it you may manipulate the truth or hide it completely. Sometimes, yes, I don’t understand, but sometimes, I do get a clue. The important thing is not that we lied to each other or if we were able to understand one another, but, did we strive to understand? More important thing perhaps is, we respect each other and don’t question.

Yes I am a mirror to you. Just as a human life is a mirror to mankind, where you are not the whole picture but one of the many colors that makes the whole portrait beautiful.

Have a wonderful day and take a good care of yourself and people around you.

Yours sincerely,

Mr. Blog.

Friday, September 09, 2005

Mr. Bird

In morning, when I was having a mug of tea, mom asked, ‘can you check the duct? (Used for ventilation basically). ‘Okay. But why?’ asked me, she mentioned that she have been hearing some noises from past two days and today is the third she heard something again. So well, there is a locked window cum door, when I opened it slightly; I saw these graceful, beautiful eyes looking directly in mine. (Sorry about the quality of picture it’s just around inch hole from where the picture is taken.)





I am not a bird expert but this looked like an eagle/falcon kinda bird to me. The pictures are more darker but with a naked eye it was more golden brownish – shiny, and did I use the words handsome, graceful, simply adorably beautiful.



So this gentleman was stuck there from atleast two and a half days, probably full three, it looked tired. So now the question, the poor thing will die in there, so how to get it out? The first thing was to close all the fan’s so if it fly’s it should be safe, the second was to create route for it, I closed all other doors just one door open to another room and from there to terrace.

Good, all set, but how or who gonna get it out of the duct? I wasn’t going in (yes I was bit scared :p) this was a wild and huge bird, what if it snatches my eye or something? :p it had strong claws and sharp nails – and just take a look at its beak. I was still thinking, like to throw a ‘chadar’ on it and than get it out etc. In the mean time, mom just held out this ‘danda’ there and just talked to it like we would do with any pet, and asked it to come on grab the stick, sit, and guess what – it did grab the stick with its claws, balanced itself by opening its huge wings while mom pulled it out. DANG…Errrr I was like, wow what a smart bird.




We left it in the terrace to fly off, but I guess it didn’t want to. Maybe it wasn’t wild; maybe it was more comfortable with people around it. If you open the door it was trying to come back in, I wasn’t sure what would it eat and if it eats meat or something, it would be frozen anyway, offered it some water which it didn’t drink in my presence. Later, after around half an hour or so … it did fly off.

No wonder these creatures are worth fortune, it was breathtakingly graceful and beautiful with brains and understanding.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

100th Entry.

Dear Mr. Blog,

This is my 100th entry here. So, is this an occasion? Shall we party? Or does it even matter? …

…does your existence matter? Or does mine? Or if it does, what is the purpose?

It’s been a while we are hanging along, spending time with one another, but, what good has it brought? Do you even know me? Do we really share? Do you think yesterday’s entry was really about what it was about, or an attempt to burry something totally different?

If so, isn’t it a lie? Aren’t we lying to each other? What are we hiding …why? From who?... you? What are we afraid of?

Do we really understand one another?

You should be like a mirror to me, thru you I could be seen, but does that really happen? You have become more like a single good portrait, which is beautiful perhaps, but far from reality.

Mr. Blog, why are we together? Just because once we said we will hang along? Do we really care or are we just keeping a promise we made once?

There was lot to say today Mr. Blog, but I just lost the urge, I guess we both aren’t going anywhere for now so…

Well, good bye for now Mr. Blog, see you later.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Intruder.

Just when I laid down to stretch my arms I saw him, my eyes burnt in anger, in disgust, and I forgot all about my tiredness. I stood up briskly, thinking, how on earth he came in my room? And why? Doesn’t he know I hate him? And then – our eyes met. He paused, as if he never knew I was here, as if, he was so innocent. But I wasn’t going to buy any of his BS, it was a time for a war, he was the one who broke the rules, he must pay, I thought, and guess what, he continued his jiggling as he don’t even care. My blood started to boil and I was certain what I must do, I walked out of the room…

… When I reenter my room I wasn’t empty handed, I was prepared for a war that must be fought, for a freedom, for what is mine and I can’t share, above all a war for the my dignity. I stood up on the bed to take my position and fired my first ‘spray’ of Mortein on this Big Fat Ugly Cockroach. He wasn’t ready for a sudden attack, his legs shook and he was about to fall but he was fast and smart, he tried to attack me with the advantage he had, yes, he could fly, but I was no ordinary victim. I was prepared for all his tactics, I jumped on the bed to dive, and he missed his attack by few inches, I am sure he realized it wasn’t going to easy for him.

He landed on another wall and stared at me as if, he was saying ‘Good, but can you dodge me this time?” and he jumped on me again, probably he was thinking I would dodge him again but No Baby, I opened fire, right on his nose, he wasn’t ready and he took a direct damage. He got scared, he ran, I ran after him, he jumped on curtain and went inside to seek refuge, I put my arm in & started to spray as for as long as I could and he popped out of it again, he couldn’t balance himself, he dropped on floor, I attacked again, he ran under the computer table but it was too late, where could he hide? I continued spraying under the table and finally he came out, I sprayed and sprayed some more.

He is still laying down there taking his final breaths, moving his legs every 20/30 seconds and watching my face to find any compassion but all he could see is my smirk full of disgust. Let his death be the warning for all other intruders, and, I am sure, none will try to be a hero for next year or so, even if they did, they will…. *devilish laughter*


Monday, September 05, 2005

Jism ki pyas

Follow these steps.

- Go to MSN.
- Type in 'jism ki pyas'
- Submit search.

And there, just the second most relevant page MSN brings up is a link to my Blog. This is exactly how one of the reader happen to jump on my blog.

I am sorry my friend, it was a disappointment and waste of your time, all because of me :(


Saturday, September 03, 2005

Change.

I am one of those who find change, difficult to accept. Let it be my pillow, obsolete software, my mug or whatever. I am in a strange proximity with the things I own, or am close to with. I usually try to avoid change for as long as I can, and it takes ages for me to get used to of it. For as long as I remember I have been using screen resolution 800x600 while almost all the world have moved to higher resolutions. Friends and cousins have started to laugh – and softwares have denied to install on this obsolete system. Finally, after much consideration I decided to move on, and set the resolution of 1024x768, I feel alien in this world. I realized how different things have been for me and for others, as what I used to see would have been totally different for them. It’s been a day and I am still uncomfortable, woeful, may God help me to hang on.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Dawn





Dawn; from my window. Yes I am bored and have nothing better to do or, to, write.