Quote of the day.

"Good judgement comes from experience; experience comes from bad judgement."

Walter Wriston

Time out.

I am at a cut off of the socialities. I need a time out; and I want to give them the same. I plan to spend time lone, mostly awake at nights, reading. And, in the meantime, I plan to do some undone stuff I need to take care of.

I am still loved.

I wasn’t expecting much of the friends/people would remember my birthday. I know, there are some sweethearts who were counting the days; but I didn’t know there are others who were counting the days but without mentioning. Although, some wished me few days earlier for various reasons but at the 12 AM Amma was the first one to wish when she entered in the room, dancing and singing the jingle when I was reading a book :) almost at the same time ‘SH’ wished online (But I saw the message few minutes later).

But all the three phones stayed quiet till 12:15 AM when ‘A’ called from Lahore. Around 1:45 ‘A2’ Wished online and opened a thread (I guess that’s when most of the people find out, and remembered :p ). Then ‘SK’ wished in a PM and opened a thread. Somewhere around 2 ‘J’ called... felt good. Then ‘SH’ called as well this time.

At 12 PM ‘SR’ wished. ‘H’ and ‘U’ sent sms from Abotabad and promised my gift and calls are due :D. ‘J’ called again around 6…what a sweetheart. ‘SN’ called around 7 PM all the way from Europe and only ‘SN’ can tell how much laugh did we had. Soon after ‘SN’s call ‘S’ called (errr too much of S’s being confusing).

Found the E-Cards in my inbox from ‘SA’ although I am still unable to open the site but this was another one that brought a smile. ‘A’ also sent the E-Card later.

The first call from what we call ‘Khi Gang’ was from ‘SM’ not before the 11 PM (What a disappointment na, the ones who should have called first called in the end :p *Emotional blackmailing wali tone banaing*). Then ‘M’sent an SMS and just before 12 AM of 26th ‘R’ called.

No! There wasn’t a party. Spent 4 hours driving and 5 hours in two different Gov. offices. Sigh.

Thank you everyone for all the love, prayers and wishes. There were so many others who wished in threads, emails, sms’s, messages etc. Thank you all.

PS: For those who dont know, my birthday was on 25th of July.

Books, Net and blah blah.

God bless KESC, due to their double phase my cable provider’s servers burst and we (the users) are suffering from NO-NET. I am using dialup right now but usually dialup never likes me, I can get disconnected even before I can post this entry and not being able to reconnect, let’s hope this doesn’t happen.

Errr I don’t know what I am writing, I seem to be in a hurry and …khair.

There was another explosion in London today—I think. Whoever these terrorist bastards are I want to line em up and shoot them once and for all.

Sigh.

Mahwash, if you are reading this I did go the book shop you suggested. I bought eight books yesterday. I didn’t find the two books I wanted to buy though.

Okay let me list them; perhaps any of you (reader of this blog) can suggest or provide some pre-reading info about any of the book. BTW do suggest which book should be read first.

1. Anna Karenina By Leo Tolstoy (I have heard a lot about this one)
2. Prophets in the Dark by David Kearns and David Nadler (an old read, but its always nice to know how the geniuses reinvent the organizations when they are about to go bankrupt)
3. Mystical Islam – An introduction to Sufism by Julian Baldick.
4. A Sufi Saint of the twentieth century – Shaikh Ahmad al-‘Alawi’ by Martin Lings. (ermm I just thought I have heard the name Shaikh Ahmad Al-‘Alawi’ somewhere so just bought it)
5. Stephen Hawking; quest for a theory of everything by Kitty Ferguson. (She writes about Hawkings quest to find the theory of everything)
6. Stephen Hawking; A life in Science by Michaed White and John Gribbin
   

Than finally there are two novels for the times when I have nothing better to do, chosen by a friend ‘M’, when I asked him to get something sci fiction or suspense… one is quite old and I don’t think other one is off my taste either… but anyways, will see.

Search Engines.

Not that I have a huge traffic on my blog coming from search engines but the few hits that I get are always redirected with weirdest keywords ever. Here are the recent three searches which directed people to my blog.

irfan pathan latest news (Google)

Who is he? Some Indian underworld guy? Ohh yes, you will get a lot of info about him on my blog :~p

kahin to ho ga july 11 2005 episode (Yahoo)

Okay. The image of this person in my mind is a middle aged auntie who missed the episode of this Indian drama. She probably had a discussion with some other auntie and she told her what happened (probably something interesting) tempting, she want to read the story word by word.

love hina's blanket scenario (Yahoo)

I don’t wana go in the description of this search…its probably too intimate.

I dare all the readers (who own a blog) to share the keywords people use to search their blogs :)

My Basha

Meet my adopted basha. Please note its not Bacha or rather Bachi but a Basha with a s.

Whoever, not going to be nice with my basha will get a stick on his/her head. That is all.

Maybe not.

“Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them”

Moments ago – the ecstasy, the bliss I felt, has faded away. I haven’t truly learned to deal, but, perhaps it was the blessing, blessing of forgetting the problems for the momentary joy. I am back on my quandary; that I have become insensitive. I care, I do – I love, I do; I just quite didn’t say it. My slacky response is not the absence of immense feelings rather it is my inability to deliver thoughts into words.

It's a beautiful day.

I was feeling hungry and thought to have a ‘Chai Paratha’ from ‘Pathaan ka Dhaaba’ and to my surprise, I found the streets wet and a fresh aroma in the breeze. Suddenly everything became beautiful and aptly fitting in the rhythm. Little kids deliberately walking on the water spots making sure to spill it out with hard punching steps. Lilt of birds, annoying dew drops were replaced by the beautiful rain drops on the windshields. I felt my sense of aesthetics suddenly developed, colorful clouds were running high, smiling as it seemed, being naughty and annoying for the poor sun and not letting it show its face today, only the glints. It looked like a team that knows they have won the day and now it’s only enjoying the frustration of its opponent. And then sitting on a broken chair right besides the road having a tea in a stainy cup. Can a life become more beautiful?

Quote of the day.

I was like a boy playing on the sea-shore, and diverting myself now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.

Sir Isaac Newton

Understanding by observing.

I watched ‘The Enterprise’ from the middle last night. It was about this nonphysical life form which stayed close to this certain part of the universe where this virus existed. A fetal, airborne virus and it would attack almost all species. This nonphysical life form called themselves observers. They would observe the reactions of other species (physical and emotional) when the virus attacks them. Like Klingons would kill the infected because they became weak and useless or Vulcans would quarantine them and try to act logically.

Then comes the Human, with a strange combination of emotions of hope, love and compassion. Just because there was a slightest hope you could save your crewman Capt. Archer took off the gloves to operate the critical instrument. Of course he did not succeed, but why would someone show such a compassionate callow act towards others when (a) the chance to save them is slim anyway and (b) if you don’t succeed this means you are dead too? This is exactly what this nonphysical life form didn’t understand and make the first contact. They were willing to observe more in order to understand the silly emotional act of humans when Capt. Archer suggested maybe you can show some compassion yourself to feel and ameliorate your understanding rather than just observe.

Filmi indeed, but lets just enjoy the movie for now.

Point in this entry? None, actually. Apart from, perhaps, sometimes, we don’t understand things or others by mere observation unless we become thee.

Will you read...

Will you read my personal diary after I depart? Or will you still consider it unethical? And burry it with the dead?

What if, it contained writings, thoughts, feelings that you never imagined, will be, atleast, in my diary?

Do yourself a favor. Don’t open it.

Rukhsati and ...

I wanted to write about and write garrulously about various happenings in recent days. Let alone it be A’s ‘rukhsati’ but this migraine from consecutive three days have left me lulled. And these daily functions of mehndi’s, weddings and valima’s. The only cozy and comfy moments I have found were in the middle of night, half laid, wrapped in my blanket in front of my PC in dim lights.

‘A’ looked gorgeous as a bride. She is – no doubt very pretty. Technologically unaware, simple and innocent and with those motherly instincts that I guess are found in most elder sisters in the family. Yet very professional and intelligent. (Did I mention she was the highest GPA holder?)

Mamo’s kids will be here in a day or two, I guess, haha, I need to hide all my books, papers, pens, cells, remote etc – like if I can?

‘M’ and ‘S’ have an interview tomorrow for the UK’s student Visa, both looked quite uncertain about the result after the recent tragic incident of bombing in London. Sad news indeed, fifty innocent souls died.

You will leave me.

My heart sinks and fear rise, breathing seems burden, time will slow down and become stagnant, I will be trapped in pain – in discomfort. You will let go the bond we have, unseen virtual connection, singularity between the two of us and all because of me. I will fail you and I will fail myself. I will say/do or I wouldn’t say/do what I should/shouldn’t have, based on your picture perfect. I am no higher; I am no angel but, the same human with my own filth, my own weaknesses. You wouldn’t accept it.. would you? I will stand there unmoved and I fear you will walk away right in front of my eyes with despised final looks, which will tear me apart, wound my heart and soul. I fear..

.. I am sorry.

Driving/automobile rants/cries.

- Petroleum prices rose again *mad*
- I hate those people who take a relaxing walk on the road when crossing it. Even if you are at the fast lane you will need to hit the breaks to slow down but they won’t take few steps faster. If you wouldn’t slow down; a collision would occur. (What if, breaks fail? Or you can’t use’em for whatever reason? There is no sense of safety from their end.)
- Above scenario applies to some modern cats; and I hate them too.
- My mechanic Sattar shifted.
- Every other day my khatara makes this new weird noise and leave me wondering what’s wrong this time?
- I hate those people who drive while their younglings in their laps.
- And I hate those drivers who wildly drive with school kids in cars/vans.
- I hate broken roads all over city.
- I hate those who (to save 200/300 meters) will drive wrong on one ways; and will end messing up whole traffic.
- I hate bikers who can’t stay in one lane and run here and there like little kids do while playing.
- I hate those truck drivers/bikers who stay in fast lane while driving at 35/40 KM.
- Did I miss the busses and coaches?

That will be all for now.